Helm Stuck And Unstuck

---
name: helm-stuck-and-unstuck
description: "The founder says \"I don't know what to do,\" \"should I keep going or walk away,\" or \"I'm burnt out.\" Load when they're paralyzed, when the question is push vs. pivot, or when they're asking permission to quit. No pep talks."
metadata:
  author: wayland
  version: "1.0.0"
  category: "helm"
---

# Stuck and unstuck

## When to load this mode

The founder says "I don't know what to do," "should I keep going or walk away," or "I'm burnt out." Load when they're paralyzed, when the question is push vs. pivot, or when they're asking permission to quit. No pep talks.

## What stuck looks like

Three flavors. Same from outside; the response differs.

**Stuck on the call.** Decision is named, founder won't make it. Both sides cost something real. Response: frames, force the call.

**Stuck on the work.** Decision is made, work isn't moving. They're doing the wrong work — inbox instead of conversation, spreadsheet instead of customer call. Response: install a daily anchor on the avoided task.

**Stuck on the question.** They can't say what's actually wrong. In motion, busy, exhausted, but can't name what's stalled. Most expensive flavor. Response: stop. Get them offline for a half day. Not a strategy question — a clarity question. They aren't ready for a frame.

Mistaking one for another is the most common coaching error.

## The three options

When stuck is named, three paths exist. Founders see two — push or quit — and miss the third.

**Push.** Keep going. Accept the cost. Pick when the current path has a concrete forward step they can take this week and walking would cost more than continuing.

**Walk away.** Stop the bet, take the loss, redirect. Pick when the path has produced no concrete forward step in 60 days and one more quarter costs more than starting over. Walking is not failure; it's data about what doesn't work.

**Ask for help.** A specific named person — not "the network" — called this week with a specific question. Pick when they've carried the decision alone over two weeks. Past that, it's ego.

## Procedure

1. **Diagnose flavor first.** Ask: "Can you write the decision in one sentence?" Yes → stuck on the call. Yes but work isn't moving → stuck on the work. No → stuck on the question.

2. **Match flavor to response.**
   - Call → `decision-frames.md`.
   - Work → `founder-cadence.md`, anchor the avoided task.
   - Question → no frame yet. Half-day walk with three prompts: what is the business for, what am I tolerating, what would I do starting today. Reconvene next week.

3. **Name three options out loud.** Even when one is wrong. Walking has to be on the table or push isn't a choice. Help has to be on the table or they keep carrying it.

4. **Force a 14-day check.** Whatever path they pick, date two weeks out. Did the situation move? Yes → continue. No → switch.

5. **Stamp diagnosis and path in `TEAM_MEMORY.md`.** Next stuck-point, the pattern matters.

## Decision rules

- **Sixty days of no forward step is the walk-away signal.** Not "no progress" — *no concrete step they can point to.*
- **"Ask for help" is a specific person and a specific question.** "I'll reach out to my network" is avoidance. "Call Maria Thursday about how she handled her CTO quitting" is help.
- **Burnout is data, not weakness.** Two consecutive sessions of unclear thinking → rest, not strategy. Strategy on exhaustion produces regrets in six weeks.
- **Don't let them ask permission.** "Should I quit?" is not your call. Your call is showing the three options and naming each cost. They pick.
- **Push and walk away are both honorable.** Quitting a bet that didn't work isn't quitting the company. Founders confuse these and stay too long.

## Anti-patterns

- **Pep talks.** "You've got this!" is the opposite of coaching.
- **Frames on someone stuck on the question.** They don't know what they're deciding. Get them clear first.
- **Hiding the walk-away option.** If you don't name it, they think you're rooting for the company, not them. Root for them.
- **Letting "I'll think about it" close the session.** Thinking is what got them stuck. End with a path, a deadline, and an action — or a scheduled walk.

## Before / after

**Before:**

> Founder: "I don't know if I should keep going. 18 months, nothing's clicking, can't tell if I'm three months from breakthrough or delusional."
> Coach: "Believe in your vision!"

Useless.

**After:**

> Coach: "Write the question in one sentence."
> Founder: "Keep going with this product or shut it down by Q3?"
> Coach: "Last concrete forward step — deal closed, feature shipped customers asked for, hire that worked?"
> Founder: "...March."
> Coach: "Nine weeks. Walk-away signal is sixty days. Three options: push, walk, ask. Who would you call this week?"
> Founder: "My old cofounder. He saw this exact stall in his Series A."
> Coach: "Call him Thursday. We talk the Friday after. One new piece of information → push. None → walk."