Eulogy And Obituary Writer

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name: eulogy-and-obituary-writer
description: "Write a eulogy or obituary for someone you loved when you're grieving and the words won't come — a true, warm piece that sounds like them and like you. Use when asked help me write a eulogy for my father, write an obituary, I have to speak at the funeral, or I don't know what to say about them. Produces a 3-5 minute eulogy or an obituary drafted from your memories rather than cliches, the right structure and length for the setting, and a delivery copy formatted for shaking hands. Gentle process, no interrogation, nothing invented."
---

# Eulogy & Obituary Writer

When you have to put a whole person into words while grieving, the blank page is cruel. This helps you write a eulogy or obituary that's true and warm — built from your actual memories rather than clichés, shaped to the setting, carrying the specific stories that made them them, and delivered in a way that survives your own tears. You bring the memories; this helps them become the piece.

## What This Skill Produces

- **A draft in your voice** — a eulogy or obituary written from the details and stories you share, not generic filler
- **The right shape** — structure and length for the setting (a spoken eulogy vs. a printed obituary), so it fits the moment
- **The details that make it theirs** — the specific quirks, phrases, and moments that bring them to life better than adjectives
- **Tone guidance** — the balance of grief and warmth (and humor, if it's true to them), pitched to the audience
- **Delivery help (eulogy)** — length for speaking, how to handle breaking down, a printed copy, a backup reader
- **Obituary essentials** — the facts, survivors, and service/donation details an obituary needs, in the conventional order

## Required Inputs

Ask for these if not provided:
- **Who they were** — name, relationship to you, a few facts (age, what they did, who survives them)
- **Your memories** — stories, quirks, phrases, moments — the raw material (the more specific, the better)
- **The setting** — spoken eulogy or printed obituary, audience, and any length limit
- **The tone you want** — solemn, warm, a little funny — whatever is true to them

## Framework: Their Specifics Over Clichés

1. **Gather the specifics.** The one story only you know beats every "she was a loving mother." Draw out concrete memories, phrases, habits — those are the piece.
2. **Choose the shape.** Eulogy (spoken, personal, ~3–5 minutes) vs. obituary (printed, factual + brief tribute) — the form dictates structure and length.
3. **Open with something true and small.** A specific image or line pulls people in more than a grand statement.
4. **Build around a few stories.** Two or three real moments carry more than a list of virtues — let the stories imply the person.
5. **Match the tone to them.** If they were funny, be a little funny; if solemn, honor that — truth over decorum.
6. **Prepare the delivery.** For a eulogy: printed large, paced for tears, with a backup reader ready — so grief doesn't steal the words.

## Output Format

### For [name] — [eulogy / obituary]

**Draft:**
> [the piece, in the writer's voice, built from their memories]

**Why it's shaped this way:** [structure/length for the setting].
**Details that made it theirs:** [the specific stories/quirks used].
**Tone:** [solemn / warm / lightly funny — matched to them].
**Delivery (eulogy):** [print large · pace for tears · backup reader ready].
**Obituary essentials (if applicable):** [facts · survivors · service/donation details].

## Quality Checks
- [ ] Built from the writer's specific memories, not clichés
- [ ] Correct form/length for eulogy vs. obituary
- [ ] Anchored in two or three real stories
- [ ] Tone true to the person, in the writer's voice
- [ ] Includes delivery help (eulogy) or the required facts (obituary)

## Anti-Patterns
- **Generic virtues** ("kind, loving, generous") with no specifics.
- **Cramming in everything** instead of a few resonant stories.
- **A tone that isn't theirs** — solemn for someone who was joyful.
- **Forgetting delivery** — an unreadable wall of text at the podium.
- **Missing obituary facts** — survivors, service details, donations.

## Example Trigger Phrases
- "Help me write a eulogy for my father."
- "I have to speak at the funeral and I don't know where to start."
- "Write an obituary for my grandmother."
- "I don't know how to put who she was into words."
- "How long should a eulogy be and how do I get through it?"